Shenanigans

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I call shenanigans.

I just saw an article that listed the ‘average cost of a wedding in New Jersey’.  It was broken out into separate categories such as transportation, catering hall, jewelry, honeymoon, etc. and each category was presented in a range.  When you added them all up, the total ranges were from $50,399 to $78,284.  So, the average is $64,342.

I searched for average undergraduate college costs in New Jersey.  I found the CNN Money site.  It listed individual schools.  So, I selected 6 that I thought represented a bit of a cross-section and weren’t too cheap.  Subjective, I know, but I wasn’t about to do all of the work that I thought CNN Money should have done for me.  Anyway, the average four year costs for Kean, Princeton, Rutgers, Seton Hall, William Paterson University and Monmouth University comes out to $98,250, after aid.

That comes out to $67 a day vs. $64,342 a day.

Let’s compare:

4 years vs. 1 night ( plus honeymoon).

50% completion rate for each.

Approximately 3000 meals vs. 1 big one (and a great buffet on the cruise)

4 years of usually stimulating conversation, research and professional development vs. a nervous speech from a buzzed best man

4 years of interacting with your best friends without parental involvement vs. 1 night of interacting with your best friends engulfed in parental involvement.

4 years of planning, preparing, developing your future vs. 1 night of celebrating your future.

$98,250 vs. $64,342.  Or, in other words…

$67 a day vs. $64,342 a day.

So, why does the $67 a day service have to keep defending its value?  Why is it that the fact that we have now invested more in higher education that amazon.com, Carnival Cruise lines and other credit purchases a scandalous fact?  It should be the other way around, no?

Now – just to be clear – I am comparing an undergraduate collegiate education to a wedding reception, NOT to a marriage.  A marriage is priceless, amazing, wonderful – to be treasured always and forever – and the greatest investment that one can make (is Stefanie still looking over my shoulder?)

We all have choices as to how to spend our money – cars, real estate, food, clothes, entertainment AND learning.  If you don’t think 4 years of higher education is worth it to you, within the limits of your budget, that is your decision.  You have every right to it.

But, when you tank up your SUV during the summer, remember that could have bought a day’s worth of higher education with that, with room and board and access to the fitness center.  Cash or credit.

Note 1: This is what you should expect to pay for a wedding in New Jersey, as per Real Simple magazine: http://www.realsimple.com/holidays-entertaining/weddings/budget/average-wedding-costs-in-new-jersey-00000000006634/index.html

Note 2: This is where I obtained my data for the area colleges.  CNN Money.

Note 3: This is South Park, calling shenanigans.

As always, I welcome your comments and questions.  Please feel free to email me at info@cc4therestofus.com, call or text me at 908-403-3819, join me on Facebook on “College Counseling for the Rest of Usand join me on Twitter at @MichaelCCR.   And now on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/user/CCRMichael?feature=mhee.

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The Wrongs of Passage

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Dear Ashley, Brad, Caitlin and Justin:

It has been a joy to work with you and your families as you have traveled along the college search journey.  In a few months, you will start your college career and I just wanted to share a simple thought with you.

You will meet new people and make new friends.  You will join new groups.

Trust your gut.  Respect yourself.

I had a whole long blog post written about the wrongs of hazing, with artfully crafted metaphors, references to recent events and deep thoughts about the value of life.  But, I think the whole topic is too simple to complicate with unnecessary wordage.  Simply…

Trust your gut.  Respect yourself.

If it seems wrong, sounds wrong, looks wrong, smells wrong…it’s quite likely to be wrong.

Trust your gut.  Respect yourself.

Almost 30 years ago, I listened to a woman describe how her son died and what she was doing to prevent others to suffer her son’s fate.  There are too many other mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, girlfriends and boyfriends who could give similar presentations.  I was proud to be part of the fraternity that sponsored that event.

Bonding with peers is a wonderful thing.  Forcing people to consume large amounts of alcohol, physically and mentally abusing peers, locking ‘friends’ in trunks is not.  The two are not connected and anyone who sells you such information is to be avoided.  Period.

But, I know that you already know that.  Just don’t forget it when the time comes.

Trust your gut.  Respect yourself.

As always, I welcome your comments and questions.  Please feel free to email me at info@cc4therestofus.com, call or text me at 908-403-3819, join me on Facebook on “College Counseling for the Rest of Usand join me on Twitter at @MichaelCCR.   And now on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/user/CCRMichael?feature=mhee.